New Radio Show!! True North Parents Wednesdays at 1pm EST

http://www.blogtalkradio.com/truenorthparents

I've been talking about having my own radio show now for about 2 years. The time seems right and the star have aligned. And guess what?! It starts THIS week!

I'll be learning to ride the bicycle as I build the bicycle, so bear with me and my learning curve. But this is going to be good fun!

I'm going to be talking about all the topics that I struggled with as a parent (and things I'm still trying to navigate) and the things that I always wanted to sit around with my parent friends and have a good discussion about. I'll be talking about those topics I see many parents struggle with. I'll be sharing my personal stories and stories from parents who have worked their way through (and maybe some parents who are still trying to find their way...). This show is meant to be interactive and you're invited to call in to join me, share your stories, and ask your questions. Shows will be recorded and archived, so you can always listen to them later.

My show will be live Wednesdays at 1pm Eastern time (NY time). Follow this link to "follow" me on Blogtalk Radio. This is also where you'll go to listen to the show.

The first show will be THIS Wednesday, February 18 at 1pm NY time. I'll be talking about finding YOUR own authentic path and some ideas for navigating all the parenting information out there. The show will be 30 minutes long, which sounds just about right.

I hope you'll join me!

Coming up in the next few weeks on True North Parents Radio:
Wed, Feb 27- Road Blocks to True North: How we get stuck and what to do about it
Wed, March 6- Mommy Guilt: Releasing Yourself so your family can Thrive!
Wed, March 13- What is an Emotionally Healthy Family anyway? Can we get there from here?

Let me know if there is something specific you'd like to talk about, someone you'd like me to interview, or suggestions for the show please post in the comments section below. I'm working on my schedule for March and April now. Join me!

E-book Give-Away! Consciously Parenting, Book 1

Today is the day!! 

I'm launching my first book as an e-book and an audio book: 

Consciously Parenting: What It Really Takes to Raise Emotionally Healthy Families! 

This is the first book in a 4-part series. I'm SO excited to get this book off my computer and into the hands of parents.

I'm also excited to announce that I'm giving away an e-copy! 

Scroll down to the bottom of this post for how to enter. 


If you win and you already bought it, I'll refund your money!

You can also click here to sign up to receive the first 3 chapters at no cost to you.  Here's an excerpt from the book:

As parents, we have a steady diet of conflicting information coming at us from all directions. The long list of essential dos and don’ts has most of us spinning our wheels in indecision, not knowing what we’re actually supposed to do to parent our children. We follow parenting advice from “experts” even if it doesn’t feel right because we aren’t sure what else to do or we feel that someone else must know what our child needs better than we do.

Consciously Parenting is about listening to your own inner guidance system, trusting your own inner voice about what is needed in your family and for your child. It is also about finding what you need and finding a way to meet your own needs in a way that still respects the needs of your child and the needs of the relationship.

Consciously Parenting gives us a compass and a map to help guide us on our parenting journey with 8 guiding principles based on current science, using intuition as our guide. No one knows our child the way we do and yet we’re so close to our own children that we can’t always see the bigger picture. Consciously Parenting is about gaining a different vantage point and remembering that the most important thing we can do as a parent is to focus on the relationship.

We’re going to make mistakes. And that’s OK. Actually, “mistakes” allow us the opportunity to reconnect and repair the relationship when there has been a disconnection, which is a critical part of attachment. Sometimes we will reach out to reconnect and sometimes it will be our child. And sometimes it will take a while before we can see that our own story is getting in the way of reconnecting.

Parenting is a journey, not a destination. We’ll take “wrong turns” and end up in scary back alleys, but we need to remember that it is only a wrong turn if we don’t learn from it. Eventually. Lessons will be repeated until learned and parenting does a great job of providing opportunities for us to learn.

We become parents because we want to have a loving connection with our children. We want to feel joy and wonder and we become frustrated when we feel anger, resentment, confusion or pain, when we see our child is suffering and we don’t know how to help her. Or maybe we’re aware that we are the one in pain. When we begin to focus on the communication behind the behaviors, we begin to see our child in a new light. And we begin to understand ourselves more deeply. Parenting becomes a gift, a treasure.

             Copyright © 2012, The Consciously Parenting Project, LLC. All Rights Reserved.

Mandatory Entry:

• Simply leave a comment below letting me know why you’d like to win!

Additional Optional Entries: (not required to win, come back here and leave a separate comment on this post for each additional entry.)

• Like The Consciously Parenting Project on Facebook
• Follow The Consciously Parenting Project on Twitter
• Subscribe to the Consciously Parenting Newsletter
• Share about this giveaway on Facebook
• Tweet about this giveaway, feel free to copy the text below:

Enter to win @tcparentingproj e-book! Enter thru 4/1/12!

• Giveaway Details:  The give away will be open until midnight EST Sunday, April 1, 2012. Winner will be announced by Monday, April 2, 2012.
• No purchase necessary to win.
• Must be 18 years of age or older to enter.
• If prize winner forfeits or does not claim the prize, prize will be re-awarded at my sole discretion.
• Void where prohibited by law.
• Make sure to leave a separate comment for each entry. Winner will be chosen at random!
• Odds of winning based on number of entries.
• This promotion is in no way sponsored, endorsed or administered by, or associated with, Facebook.
• NOTE: In order to enter the contest you must leave a comment on my blog post. To leave a comment scroll to the bottom of the post fill in the form. (If you are reading this via RSS, you will need to visit my actual blog to post a comment.)
• If you purchase the e-book and win a free copy, we'll refund the amount of your e-book purchase.
• Good Luck!

On This Mother's Day

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Can I help you create a virtual community of support?

Comment from reader: I have really looked to find other parents who believe in parenting from a conscious place and I’m just not sure they exist in my community. I know that finding others in person is the best plan, but what can I do to get support now? Any suggestions?



This is a really great question and one that I hear often from parents- moms and dads from every corner of the globe. Recently, I have received many requests for opportunities to connect with other like-minded parents. I personally have had much success finding support from online groups, as well as over the phone. When I didn’t have a strong local support for whatever I was dealing with OR I didn’t necessarily want to open up to someone I might run into next week at the grocery store, the computer seemed to be a great place to start to look for support.

2008 Consciously Parenting Retreat in St. Pete Beach, FL



A couple of years ago, a group of parents from around the world came together for a tele-class I taught. There was a mom from Australia and a mom from Oregon. Michigan, Wisconsin, New York, and Florida were also represented. Most had adopted children. All were interested in learning more about trauma - their child’s or their own - so they came together for that purpose. When the tele-class ended, no one wanted it to end. Even though I had no more curriculum ready to teach, I said that I would figure it out and offered to continue to open the space for them to come and discuss their challenges and ask their questions, so we continued to "meet" over the phone. After a little while, they learned to really listen to and support one another, and they each grew from being able to support someone else.  They had support when they needed it.  When I had a live retreat in 2008, all but one (who had recently lost her job) came from around the globe to meet one another - to meet these people they had never met in person before, but who had changed their lives forever.

That experience moved me. Who knew how powerful talking on the phone once every two weeks could be, along with a private space for questions and conversations in the meantime? And each of them grew in ways that they didn’t know they could. The each knew that no matter what they needed to bring up, they would have listeners who could hear what they needed to say without judgment. Isn’t that what we all want?  To be able to say what is really going on with us instead of just what we think someone else wants to hear?


So I’m considering starting another venture like the one I just mentioned, with parents who are wanting to come together and talk on the phone once every two weeks with opportunity for a private forum for discussions in between. I’m looking for a group no larger than 8 people who are wanting to learn how to apply the principles of Consciously Parenting to their lives. You’d need to be willing to take a look at what is going on in your home and to support others in doing the same from a place of love, honoring that everyone has their own journey. This group will be moderated and guided. If it would be easier to start with a class to have a basic foundation of information, I’m happy to do that, too. This group will be open to parents with children of any age, and families of any size, shape, or story as to how you became a family. The glue that holds us together is the fact that we are here to parent consciously and to look deeply at our stories. Tell me what you need and let’s figure out how to create it!


The cost of this venture will be minimal, at about $50/mo, which is less than one hour of consultation with me. A sliding scale is available if you have financial need.


What do you think? Would you find such a group helpful? If so, what appeals the most to you about it? If not, what would help you more?

Next week, I’ll be on my way to Cozumel, Mexico on the Consciously Parenting Project’s February cruise! I’m looking forward to some sun, and some time to play, relax, and connect with some of the most incredible families on the planet who are all excited about being warm for a few days! I’ll tell you all about it when I get back!

P.S. I’m also working on a more in-depth program for those who would like to dive in deep. This would involve training over the phone/internet monthly and two in-person groups in the Tampa/Clearwater area over about a year’s time. This would be perfect for those who are looking to really do some deep work themselves and/or for those who are professionals supporting other families in any capacity. Let me know if you’re interested in something like that, too!

30 Day Challenge, Day 21: Finding the Gifts

I don't know how it is for you in your life right now, but I have to say that I am seeing a lot of people having a very hard time right now.  Lots of death, tragedy, and general unsettling news seems to be floating in the air all around us.  And I'm not watching the news or reading the paper.  A neighbor just informed me of her pending divorce.  An elderly friend suddenly died last week.  Someone else I know suffered a massive stroke and didn't make it.  And now, of all things, my kitten has fleas!

Today is the anniversary of my son, Jacob's, death.  He died of anencephaly a few hours after he was born 8 years ago today.  When I was going through the uncertainty of that pregnancy, a book ended up in my hands entitled "In the Flow of Life" by Eric Butterworth (copyright 1982).  The book is yellowed on the spine and stained on the cover- definitely well-loved before it ever came into my hands.  As I was flipping through the book this morning, I opened to a passage I read frequently during the time I knew something might be wrong with my baby:

"If you are faced with a challenge, refuse to be panic-stricken.  Life has not ended for you.  Life flows on.  Declare for yourself: I accept the reality of this situation, but not its permanence.  Certainly there is no point in hiding your head in the sand.  The experience is there to be met. Determine that you will meet it, but on your terms.  Do not let the outer happening squeeze you into its box, but open your mind to the flow of wisdom, love, and good judgment by which you can deal masterfully with it.  Stand tall as you affirm: I meet this circumstance in complete confidence that He who is in me is greater than he who is in the world.  I do not deny its reality, but I deny its permanence.  I know that this, too, shall pass away."

And it was true.  Here I am 8 years later.  I do not deny its reality, but I can see clearly that it wasn't a permanent situation.  And somehow, I did manage to open myself to the flow of wisdom and love to have as many choices as I could regarding his birth.  He was born at home surrounded by loved ones.  And he was held for his entire life.  How many of us are half that lucky?

But even more than navigating through his birth and death, I now understand that this situation was to become the catalyst for me to have a deeper understanding of myself and of my oldest son.  And then my son, Josh, who came 15 months later.  And to understand what happens in a family when something overwhelming happens and how we can all navigate it together to become better and stronger than we were before.  Jacob brought with him many, many lessons.  And those lessons were the hardest ones of my life.  But I am grateful that he was here.  At the time, I marveled how much such a short life could have such a great impact on so many people.  And that was just the beginning.

I founded The Consciously Parenting Project and launched our website 3 years ago today in memory of Jacob.  It seemed like a much better place to put the energy that still remained from that experience to help others and make a difference in the world.  Somehow, I know that Jacob would have wanted it that way.

So if you are facing a challenge today, maybe you'll find some peace in Eric Butterworth's words.  Or maybe you have some ideas of your own that you'd like to share with us.  We all have our losses.  We all have our challenges in parenting and in our lives.  We may not have a choice in what happens, but we always have choices regarding how we handle it.  Is it a tragedy or is it an opportunity?  What story will we tell years from now about this time or this event?  And can we find the strength to find our way from the place of pain (which we have a right to be in for a while) to that place of recognizing the gifts?

Today, I nurtured myself as I remembered Jacob's life and his gifts.  And I am grateful.

Respect

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New Class!

I'm excited to announce the birth of my new baby- a class based upon my book that will one day (soon) be finished (I promise!). The 5 week class is called Consciously Repairing Relationships and it is based upon the mismatch between what we think parenting will be like and the reality of parenting. On my own parenting journey, I read inspiring books that left me feeling inept. Why couldn't I parent that way? What was in the way? This class is about what is in the way and how to move through it, into peace and unconditional love for yourself and your children. It talks about the brain science of parenting, so it isn't just based in opinion. But it isn't full of mumbo jumbo, either.

So much of parenting information is about short term compliance. When we focus on that, we might get them to do what we ask when we're looking, but it doesn't help the relationship! And what happens when our backs are turned? When we focus on our relationship, our child's natural desire to please us can surface. This class is about removing the parenting Chinese Handcuffs together. In this process, we'll understanding ourselves and our children in a whole new light and start moving into a peace we often dreamed of, but weren't sure was possible.

These classes are like nothing else out there! Participants don't want the classes to end (and I hate to see parents go, too!) and often find themselves with bonds to friends from all over the world. Classes are based very much upon what is going on with each family, rather than just a lecture. They are more like parenting support classes than just a class you take and soon forget about. Expect to be transformed in ways you didn't think possible! Just remember, parenting is a journey, not a destination, and lasting change takes time and dedication to achieve. But it is possible if you're willing to take the first steps on this journey!

I'm hosting a free demo class next Tuesday, January 5 at 8:30PM Eastern so that you can see what the class is like. This class will be a Webinar, which means that you'll be able to see me on video and see my Power Point presentation. If you don't have access to a computer at that time, you can call in and just listen to the presentation or you can watch the recording later. If you're interested in joining in on the free Webinar, please send an email to Lianne at admin@consciouslyparenting.com and she'll make sure you're on the list to get the information!

We're having a buy one, get one free special for my two classes starting in January- Connection Parenting and Consciously Repairing Relationships. If you love Consciously Parenting classes and have been trying to get a friend to try it out, now is your chance! Or if you've always wanted to try a class, but just hadn't done it yet, now is a great time. You can split the cost with a friend or gift your friend with a free class. But don't miss it! Once this class is full (registration is capped at 7), this deal will be gone.

Here's a link to the course description and the sign up page.

Blessings to each of you for a prosperous and connected New Year!
Rebecca

Happy Birthday, Parenting Outside the Box!

Yesterday, on July 1, 2009, I completed the first draft for my book, Parenting Outside the Box, which will be published later this year. I'm so excited to have this part finished! It has taken me more than 2 years of writing and 36 years of personal and professional experience to get to the point that I could write it! The book was handed into the loving arms of my book "midwife" who is going to clean it up and get it ready for publishing! It has been an amazing journey that has gotten me here to this point and I'm so excited to share it with you!

If you are on Facebook, I'm posting quotes from my book all day today there. If you'd like to join us there, here is a link to the Consciously Parenting Facebook page. Check it out and share it with your friends if you like what you read! Here are some quotes to get you started:

Feedback loops are patterns of communication, spoken and unspoken. It is important to recognize that intention, unconscious communications, and body language speak just as loudly, if not louder, than our spoken words.

When we seek only to make a behavior stop, we miss the communication and sometimes even the opportunity for our child to develop to his fullest potential.

The words we use to describe our children can help to connect us or create disconnection right from the start.

The difficulties our children present to us are opportunities for us to grow beyond where we are in this moment.

I'll be posting more later today on Facebook. Check it out!

What do you think of when you read those? I'll be posting excerpts here over the coming weeks and months so that you can read some more of the book yourself.

Hope you are having a wonderful day!