Wednesday, February 20, 2013

Finding YOUR own True North

I was talking to a friend about my first radio show topic, Finding Your Own True North. "How did you find your true north?" I asked. He said, "That's easy. Something tragic happens, you emerge from the fog, eventually, and suddenly everything is more clear and you know what's important and what's not." He had lost his wife suddenly a couple of years before. That kind of loss, I've seen from my clients, brings clarity when someone finds their way through to living life again.

For many of us, our parenting journey becomes a catalyst for discovering who we really are and what is important to us. My guest, Christy Farr, shared how a miscarriage at 12 weeks was the beginning of her empowerment: knowing what was important to her and then being able to take action. For me, it was choosing a midwife instead of an obstetrician when I took my first steps toward what was really true for me.

But outside of those big wake-up calls some of us have experienced directly or indirectly, how do we find our way? How do we know which decisions are right for us and our family and which decisions are not a good fit? How do we find our own True North?

True North is a directional term from the days when we used compasses to find our way. Turns out there is a difference between True North and North on a compass. A compass points to magnetic north and that changes over time. True North doesn't change, but can be harder to find. I read pages of ways to find True North if you're camping and without a compass. It reminded me a bit of those horrible math problems we all had to solve about trains traveling different directions at different speeds that just made my head spin. Some of the examples for finding True North included putting a stick in the ground, marking certain angles, standing on your head, waiting 15 minutes... And so it is with parenting and finding your own True North. Sometimes I think it is most helpful if you do some headstands and twirl around a bit to really get oriented in parenting.

In life's journey and on our journey as parents, which can be harrowing or hilly, when we know where our True North is, things are somewhat easier or at least it feels better than when we don't know our True North or are ignoring it. When we know what is important to us and we're able to voice what is important, we can more easily navigate on our day-to-day journey. But how do we know what to do?

Join me today for my very first Blogtalk Radio show where I explored this very topic with my friend and colleague, Christy Farr! You can listen to the archived version here. Show airs Wednesdays at 1pm EST (NY). You can even call in with your questions or post them in the comments section and I'll try to answer them. On the page, there is even a spot for you to chat with me and ask questions without having to pick up your phone.

So have you found your own True North? Did it take a big event in your life to make things clear or did you find your own way one small step at a time? Or maybe both? I'd love to hear from you. Feel free to add your thoughts to the comment section below.

Thanks for joining me on my latest adventure!

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